Unpack

I came back from Germany five weeks ago, and I have been unpacking ever since. First the very heavy suitcases, then the thoughts and feelings I came back with. 

Visiting my family in Germany was different this time. The good-byes for sure have changed over the years. The certainty that you will see each other again is gone. I try to choose my words better. I try to see only the important things and not to get lost in moments that won't matter in the long run. I try to make happy, and to be happy. I am grateful that I still have my parents, and I wished I could take away my mom's parkinson and my dad's age-related struggles.

Not only because being healthy and fit would make their lives easier but also because being ill and old has turned out to be a challenging job with lots of overtime hours. There is hardly a day without doctor visits, physio or speech therapy. Nurses go in and out. Cooking has become an exhausting chore but those home-cooked meals just taste better than delivered ones. And then the constant health insurance issues to keep up with, all that paperwork. It's a busy life, way too busy for old people. I want my parents to enjoy what's left, I'm glad I could give them a break, at least.

My son Jacob enjoyed being in Germany even though there was much less to do for him than in the previous years when we all would go on little field trips, visited museums, parks, festivals. Instead now, Jacob played word games with his grandmother and solved algebra problems with his grandfather. They watched TV together, discussed the news and consumer reports. He actually loved that.

I would get up very early in the morning to spend time with my dad while making breakfast, it was nice having this time with him alone. And afterwards, while we were waiting for the morning nurse to arrive, my mom and I had some coffee at her bedside and we talked about this and that.  And I cooked a lot, I mean, a lot. So they could take some out of the freezer, later.

Jacob and I had taken the train to travel from the city where we landed to my parents' home town. The city where we landed is also the city where my husband's family lives, and we spent a few days with Markus' mom and his brother's family. Jacob loved seeing his other grandmother and his cousins who are just a bit older than him. And we saw my sister-in-law who was about to lose her fight against cancer. She and I hadn't been very close but, I think, we understood each other anyway. This beautiful vibrant woman, now she was lying there, so fragile and still. Jacob gave her a gentle hug, I held her hand, it was so weak. We talked a little bit, and when I told her that we would come back soon she said, that would be nice.

We saw her again right after we had returned from my parents. She had been moved to a hospice meanwhile. I don't know if she recognized Jacob and me, I hope she sensed it somehow. She didn't say anything, and her eyes were closed. She died a week later.

My husband and my daughter picked us up from the airport, all of us - Jacob and me and those heavy suitcases. It took me a while to do the laundry, and to get organized again, and to find places for the things I brought home with me. Old and new German books for example, lots of chocolate to share, several table cloths that my mother-in-law had embroidered, Markus' portfolio with his wonderful old comic drawings, an outdated tour guide that my parents had used on one of their many travels through the States, a spicy-smelling wooden bowl from my sister-in-law's kitchen, a large and heavy ceramic vase that my mom's family carried when they fled from post-war East Berlin to the West.

Soon after, I unpacked the many boxes of our Christmas decorations. Lots of them are from my own childhood, some of them Markus and I bought before we had our children,  gifts from my students, Jacob's and Mona's paper stars, my grandmother's crocheted mushrooms. I unpacked the memories attached to each one of the hundreds of ornaments and hung them on our huge tree. It's a beautiful tree.

All In Butter

So, you probably cook a lot of German dishes - that is one of the questions I get a lot when people find out that I am from Germany. Do I? Well, in a way it's true, most of the meals I cook for my family are variations of what my grandmother or mother used to cook for me. My grandmother was from Pomerania which is Poland today, so she cooked a lot of cabbage, potatoes, and meat. She also went through two world wars and knew hunger, therefore she also learned how to make the most out of cheap ingredients. I remember having a lot of stews and soups, most of them I liked, some I didn't but I ate them anyway. Because it was still the time when you just ate what was on the table.

My mother on the other hand loved spicy foods and experimented with all kinds of international cuisines. Exotic foods and restaurants have been available in Germany for as long as I remember. Germany has been an immigration country since after the Second World War when Germany hired guest workers from Portugal, Italy, Greece and Turkey to rebuild the country. And these workers stayed, they brought their flavors to Germany, their street foods and spices, restaurants, bakeries, grocery stores. We didn't go to restaurants much but when we did we would go to a Greek or "Yugoslavian" place where you could order lots of deliciously seasoned meat for very little money. And then all these other international eating places popped up. I love this about Germany, its intercultural flavors.

So, yeah, I cook a lot of German dishes, I scoop up whatever I find in the German melting pot. And then I add parsley. I add parsley to nearly everything savory. It goes with all kinds of dishes, has lots of vitamin C and makes everything look pretty. Garnishing with parsley is probably very German.
Garnishing per se is very German.

Whatever you bring to the table has to look pretty because "the eye eats, too" as we say. Don't forget to carve a pattern into the butter before you bring it to the table, if you want to make a good impression and love your company. 

Which brings me to something I never really thought about before: I actually use a lot of butter in my cooking, and that is probably the most authentic German ingredient in my cooking. We always buy butter in six-pound packages, we need butter, even though butter officially doesn't have a good nutritional reputation, especially not in the States. But coconut or olive oil just won't do it in most recipes, in my opinion. Anyways, in Germany butter is holy. I would even say butter is the essence of German culture.

Just as the US-American culture seems to be based on sugar, the German culture appears to be built on butter. German children grow up on butter cookies and butter pretzels. The finest and most festive fine cakes contain extra butter. If you want to be especially nice to your dinner guests (or family) you will spread an especially thick layer of butter on the petite sandwiches you are going to offer. Food and sharing meals are expressions of love and hospitality in many cultures, and in Germany it seems to be especially manifested in the use of butter.

The butter belief is reflected by many German sayings, but this one sums it up like no other: "All in butter" ("Alles in Butter") which means "Everything is okay." 

Seven Days

I have been challenged by a friend to post on facebook seven B/W pictures of my life. No people, no explanations.

So I have randomly been going through my digital photo folders to see if there is something I can use. There were so many pictures I hardly remembered. Many pictures of my many visits in Germany, even more pictures of my beautiful children. My beloved sister who I don't see as often as I want and need to. Birthdays, vacations, anniversaries. Good days not ever to forget. Moments to hold on to, later.

Loved

I didn't take the time to take a closer look at all the pictures, not now.

Surprised

 
I picked seven photos that are visual translations of my predominant feelings.

Passionate

Hopeful

Proud

Comforted

Safe

You Are Here

Well - I think, I am done with this one. It is the piece that I am going to submit to the "Mapping Out a Future for the Arts" exhibit in December. Our fabulous local Arts Council came up with this intriguing project and invited a number of artists to create works with outdated topographical maps of the local parishes.

The idea for my piece was to focus mainly on the point of origin. Simply because the direction of your path depends on where you are starting from.

I tore up the area maps to make the buddha face. For the background I used the oceans that I found in an old world atlas as I wanted to embed the local dimension into a global context.  The same world atlas also contained a section about the genesis of the universe and I cut out a little bit of the space for the black "You are here" marker.

"You Are Here"
Collage of torn topographical area maps and world atlas pages, ink,
on canvas panel, 20" x 16"

Where Am I?

Okay, so we are well in October already. I will be leaving for Germany in two and a half weeks and until then I have plenty to do. Right now I am working on a piece to submit to a group exhibit which is titled: "Mapping Out a Future for the Arts." The invitation to participate in this project came in the summer. I was asked to pick three maps from several stacks of outdated area maps and do something artful with them. Since then I have been thinking about the map piece, and I was happy to get started a few days ago with a clear concept in my head. Looks like I will be able to finish this weekend.

I like working with maps, I love the look and the message of maps. Incorporating maps in a piece of art is somewhat tricky though because it has become so very popular to make all sorts of crafty projects with maps. I want people to look at my piece as something new and not associate it with all those map crafts. A lot of those map crafts I do like a lot. You may want to check out pinterest on this some time; there are quite a few fantastic ideas about how to give that shabby table or bookcase an eclectic map-overhaul. Love those mappy lamps. Or you can make a romantic pendant that shows where you met your love. Sure, why not. Someone found it fashionable to paste map snippets on her fake fingernails. And then those countless ideas for ornaments, magnets, envelopes, jewelry pieces, boxes, frames - yes, anything can be mapped. Or you can make huge letters covered with maps that spell "Home" or "Paris". Right.  

I really loved the shoes that I saw on a photo somewhere: Those high heels were entirely made of maps and newsprint. These shoes perfectly summarized the story of someone who has traveled the world but never had her feet touch the grounds of a different culture. Maybe the critique on superficial traveling was not intentional, but the shoes contain that message anyway and I love them for that. Because I feel that some of the intercultural misconceptions could be easily cleared up if people would use their rare opportunities to travel abroad for getting to know a little bit about the culture they are coming across. Because life is not a Sound of Music tour.

30 in 30 - check!

So, yes, I had signed up for the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by Leslie Saeta, and finished. What a month that was! I enjoyed the process and I am quite proud of my collection. But it sure is nice to do nothing for a day or two before I get onto the next things on my agenda.

30 in 30 - this is my harvest of September 2017:

Ancestry

Day 30

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by artist Leslie Saeta.

Yes, this is number 30! Got it done, and it was quite fantastic, at least most of the times. I don't really mind the time pressure, generally I work well with deadlines. I hardly have blocks ever but sometimes I run into the problem that my original concept that seemed simply perfect, just wouldn't work out at the end for this or that reason. Therefore I have a few unfinished pieces now that I need to think about some time.

Anyways, here is my last piece for this challenge, "Ancestry." I made it to remember our foremothers that are often forgotten. And because matryoshkas are cute.

 "Ancestry"
Acrylics, ink, storybook clippings, on canvas panel, 8" x 8"

Thank you again, Leslie Saeta, for hosting the 30-in-30 challenge. It has been so interesting to see your daily beautiful piece as well as all the amazing works of so many different artists from so many parts of the world. Thanks for having me!

The Things I Know About Mr. Lee

Day 29

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by Leslie Saeta.

I've been thinking about this piece for a while. It's about Mr. Lee, the old man who used to live not far from us in that small run-down house, just round the corner of my kids' school. He doesn't live there anymore, and for some reason I miss him.

I've been passing by Mr. Lee's house a few times daily for seven years. If the weather was pleasant he would sit on the porch and watch the people come and go in their cars. When there was a storm brewing, I hoped he would be okay because the roof seemed not very reliable. And I always worried about him during the cold winter days.

He kept a few chairs and a card table outside, once in a while he had friends over to play dominoes.  A friend told me that he used to grow vegetables in a small plot across the street. He probably liked tomatoes. One time I noticed the bag of tomatoes that someone had left for him on his chair.

His name was not really Mr. Lee, I only called him that because he lived on Lee Avenue. I never knew his true name. We never talked. But a few years ago we started waving and smiling at each other.

After the long summer I realized that I hadn't seen Mr. Lee in a while. His house looked deserted. Some windows were opened, and it was obvious that someone had gone through his things. I wondered if Mr. Lee had died. Or maybe he is in a nursing home now, playing dominoes all day long.

Two weeks ago we found the house burnt down. The whole area smelled like barbecue. A wall had collapsed and revealed the leftovers of Mr. Lee's life. I often stop at the house for a moment which now is just a pile of debris fenced in by yellow caution tape.

Good bye, Mr. Lee. I hope you were a nice person because I miss you.

"The Things I know About Mr. Lee"
Acrylics, gesso, fly leaves, clippings from books and magazines, on canvas panel, 20" x 16" - I used an old domino for the block printing.


 

Pioneer

Day 28

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

I just love how this piece has come together: Pacman is exiting the "New World" through the centerhole of the Columbia record sleeve to explore what's beyond.

I wonder, if the C in Columbia was actually meant to look like Pacman, or if that is just a funny coincidence.





"Pioneer"
Acrylics, record sleeve, book clippings, fly leaf, on canvas panel, 8" x 8"

Stand Up

Day 27

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by Leslie Saeta.

Yesterday, I dropped off a few donation items at my favorite thrift store and, of course, I had to step into this paradise for a little while, too. I found a few very interesting things, among those an old copy of Robinson Crusoe which I already used today.

I made this little piece about the idea of liberty and the necessity and ability to stand up for your rights.

I incorporated several Robinson pages to make the house walls. I thought, the male neoclassical economic perspective reflected an accurate context for this hard working woman.
 
"Stand Up"
Watercolor, ink, pages and clippings from books and magazines, on watercolor panel, 12" x 12"

Make Contact

Day 26

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by Leslie Saeta.

A while ago, I got a 70s cook book on "Variety Meats" at a library book sale. It's a fantastic book. Because every one of the suggested dishes looks questionable, to say the least, but the words to describe these creations are simply out of this world.

About the particular dish that I used in my piece, the caption said: "Sweetbreads and ham, with mushrooms and sherry sauce, served on toast, are elegantly presented under individual glass bells, to keep them moist and warm." Yes.

I wonder if people from outer space wouldn't confuse the glass bell with a UFO. I would, I certainly would.



"Make Contact"
Acrylics and book clippings on canvas panel, 16" x 12"

Prophylaxis

Day 25

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

It's always good to be prepared.

"Prophylaxis"
Watercolor, ink, book clippings, on watercolor panel,  8" x 10"

Hit

Day 24

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.


I used the photos of a 77 highschool yearbook for the background. I took some time looking at their faces, their crazy hairdos. I wonder about their friendships, do they still know each other? - The Smash sleeve also has "The Beat" handwritten on it. 

Inspired by my fears. 



"Hit"
Collage from yearbook pages, record sleeve, fly leaf, and book clipping, on canvas panel, 12" x 16" 

It's Not Too Late

Day 23

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by artist Leslie Saeta.

All is said and done, it seems. But then -

"It's Not Too Late"
Acrylic, ink, book pages and clippings, on canvas panel, 9" x 12"

Skipping Dinner

Day 22

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by artist Leslie Saeta.

So - I have made something inspirational for a change.

"Skipping Dinner"
Acrylics, ink, book clippings, on canvas panel, 12" x 16"

Desire

Day 21

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

Made a little drawing.

"Desire"
Acrylic, colored pencils, storybook clippings, on bristol paper, 9" x 12"

Find Home

Day 20

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

I am making plans to go to Germany for a few weeks. My husband and I are both German, and our original families are in Germany. Since they cannot come, we go.  I usually go twice a year, often I take one of my children with me. This time, it's going to be my son. He's quite excited. I just love being on planes, he says. The chicken-or-pasta question, the bagged blankets, the movies, the hairdryer sounds, the smell, you know, Mom. Yes, I know.

I kind of like flying, too. I think, what I enjoy most is the time. The time that I have for myself without any commitment. I can just sit and do nothing.

I often get the comment that I must be happy to go home. Indeed, I am always looking forward to come back to what I left behind, especially to family and friends, but also to all the sweet little things that make Germany Germany, like unique cafes, fabulous book stores, street musicians, the walking and biking mentality, the chocolate, the cheeses and breads, the sitting outside for hours. Men holding hands, women holding hands, and nobody is looking. And then all these different voices and faces; a bus driver with a turban said to me once that he never thought that Germany would be like this: a little United Nations.

I grew up with the diversity of people. In Germany you are physically much closer together than here in the States. This comes with problems sometimes, but nevertheless - being closer makes you more connected simply because you have to be. You have to get along because Germany is a small country. You have to make it work.

Yes, I am happy to go home. Whatever that means. Home doesn't seem to be a mere place, a location. I wouldn't want to live in my old hometown again, not even in Hamburg, the city I enjoyed so much and where I lived last before I came to the States. Where I live now doesn't feel like home either, even though I love our life here, I love the way how our family is here.

"Home" for me feels more like a google cloud, it is a vague conglomerate of strong memories and strong desires. The moment that beholds the very essence of this cloud is remembering myself as a young child sitting with my sister at my grandmother's kitchen table. We were having breakfast, sourdough bread with butter and sugarbeet syrup. And milk with a little bit of coffee. My grandmother never sat with us because she was always stirring in some pots. I remember her happy face while she was cooking, the apron she was wearing, sewn on her old Pfaff sewing machine like all the dresses that she had been sewing for us. The lids of the large aluminum pots were moving releasing steam and smells and bubbly sounds. The burnt matches on the stove, I liked how they tasted. Sometimes the radio was on. We were sitting at the heavy kitchen table with that screechy big drawer containing some nesting enamel bowls. I don't remember what we talked about during the times at the table, or if we did talk at all. I remember observing my grandmother, I see her back. And I remember feeling loved and complete.

All these thoughts I placed into this painting. The shapes and the lines of the city map that this little mouse is holding, reminded me of the pattern of the curtains  that were hanging in my grandmother's kitchen when my sister and I were with her. Maybe the colors were different but it was in just that delicate 50s style. My mom just asked me if I would like to have my grandmother's kitchen curtains but it turned out that she meant the ones that came on to replace the ones that I remember so well. Brown ones with bold orange flowers.  I will have a look at them in a few weeks.

"Find Home"
Acrylics, storybook cutouts and snippets, on canvas panel, 14" x 18"

Hide and Seek

Day 19

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by artist Leslie Saeta.

I have a lot of works in progress but for some reason I have been struggling with little details here and there and cannot finish the pieces as fast as I thought I would. Sometimes I get overwhelmed with the multitude of all those fantastic possibilities.

Anyways, I made "Hide and Seek," which is an homage to one of my favorite artists, Paul Klee.

In one of his famous paintings, a "Red Balloon" ascends from a cubist city. I wanted to do the opposite and made a fish plopping into the sea of houses.

The most part of my life I lived in big cities. I loved it, even though I didn't always find what I was seeking there. But I could hide when I wanted to.

"Hide and Seek"
Oil pastels, acrylic, book clippings, on watercolor paper,  8.5" x 11"

Wall of Fame

Day 18

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

I used one of my dear Humpty Dumptys for this one, and one not so common vintage record sleeve. I just love how this poor, pitiful thing is dropping so helplessly from the wall of fame.

I could say a lot about walls. I don't like them, and I am happy about every one that comes down, especially those in the heads.

"Wall of Fame"
Acrylics, inkpen, record sleeve, storybook clippings, on canvas panel, 9" x 12"

See the World

Day 17

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

Yes, again, I am one day behind, but I am catching up nicely. I think. I hope.

"See the World"
Watercolor, storybook clippings, on watercolor paper, 4.5" x 5.5"

Bless You

Day 16

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge, thought up and hosted by artist Leslie Saeta.

I always wondered why people would bless a big sneeze!

However, in this country, Bless you seems to be the thing to say when someone is suddenly having a very loud and scary outburst, shaking up the surroundings, and spreading tons of germs on top of that.

Well, if a big sneeze deserves a lovely blessing, then quite a few of the disturbing things that are happening here make much more sense to me. Anyways, Gesundheit!

"Bless You"
Acrylics, ink, pages from an old German Theodor Storm book, storybook clippings, 12" x 16", on canvas panel

Faux Pas

Day 15

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge, hosted by artist Leslie Saeta.

I spent this day on lots of details of future works and barely got this one finished. It actually is the piece that I should have done yesterday, so today's work is still on my to-do list ...

Well, here is "Faux Pas" - wooden shoes meet fancy-pants.  One example for many out-of-place scenarios.

Watercolor, ink, storybook clippings, on watercolor paper, 7.5" x 11"

Screen Time

Day 14

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge, yes! And, so far things have been going well. Two intense weeks, I knew it would be like this, but it has been a very productive time, and that's the important aspect.

This little piece I made about the modern concept of "Screen Time." Our kids don't really have an issue with getting too much of it, not on a daily basis at least. Once in a while they certainly would watch one Teen Titans Go episode too many, which is excusable because it's a really funny cartoon. And I have to admit that we let the kids chase something or someone on their nintendos during those precious Saturday morning hours when my husband Markus and I are trying to sleep in.

If someone in our family has screen time issues it's probably Markus and I, because we are consuming way too much news these days.

Now look at this little guy throwing a fit when his mom (or wife?) tells him that he is not going to find out if Tinman will finally get his heart simply because screen time's up. Not fair!

"Screen Time"
Watercolor, ink, book clippings, on watercolor paper, 17" x 5.5"

Is That You?

Day 13

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

After yesterday's Musical Chairs I had to breathe, so I made  something small. Here it is: something small - yet with big content. Because it has to do with identity, and with this awkward situation of when you run into someone that you haven't seen for a very long time, and the first thing you hear is about your appearance. Wow, you are looking good, that's probably a compliment. Or - hey, look at you, how have you been, which translates into: you are looking terrible. Anyways, situations like these always make me think about what I have in common with the me from let's say twenty years ago. What makes me me and you you are certainly interesting matters to think about and questions that never get old. 

"Is That You?"
Watercolor, ink, book clippings, on watercolor paper, 9.5" x 5.5"

Musical Chairs

Day 12

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge hosted by California artist Leslie Saeta. Leslie's work is quite fantastic, and so are the pieces posted daily by all kinds of artists from lots of countries around the globe. Have a look some time!

I have spent nearly all day on these Musical Chairs, and I am thrilled that I am finally done and that I actually like them. All of a sudden, species extinction looks like a fun thing!

I used sheet music from around 1920, a collection of Franz Schubert songs, that I recently found at an estate sale. I had tons of sheet music in my studio already but I couldn't resist getting these anyway because Schubert's songs are book-bound with a beautiful printed red edge and occasional pencil notes, besides the natural yellowing of the pages. The beautiful book is falling apart though, the paper is very brittle and tears and crumbles immediately when I turn the pages. I love the opportunity to honor this old document by using it for my piece.

"Musical Chairs"
Acrylics, sheet music, book clippings, on canvas panel, 16" x 20"

Coming Out

Day 11

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

I'm back on track, yes! Here is my 11th piece for Day 11: "Coming Out."

Again, I used a record sleeve as an anchor. I really enjoyed using that old RCA record sleeve recently for my "Night and Day" (Day 7) , and I have so many ideas of how I want to use the other beautiful sleeves that I have collected over the years. For "Coming Out" I chose a Capital sleeve. I remember that I found it in the musty corner of a tiny thrift store somewhere in the South of this country, and I also remember that it was surprisingly pricy, oh well. So I thought I would use it for something special one day.

I think, "Coming Out" may be that special occasion, because I believe that one of the most important things in life is to find out who you are and be okay with it. People may not like it but that's alright.

"Coming Out"
Acrylics, record sleeve, book clippings, on canvas panel, 12" x 12"

Gossip

Day 10

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

I've been working on several pieces today, and I have been quite productive even though I took significant time off to do my CrossFit workout and also for a very long phone call with my parents who live in Germany. They are doing fairly well, thanks for asking. - So here is one of the fruits of my labor, "Gossip." 

I think, the greenish tone of the water goes quite well with the Klimtish fish talk.

"Gossip"
Watercolor, book clippings, on watercolor paper, 15" x 11"

Catch Up

Day 9

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge by Leslie Saeta.

Today is Day 10 but I have just finished yesterday's piece. Oh my, I am behind!

So, here is my piece "Catch Up." Need to go now! - No time to say hello, goodbye! I'm late! I'm late! I'm late!

Watercolor, ink, snippets and cutouts from storybooks, on watercolor canvas panel, 12" x 12"

Seeds

Day 8

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

I've made a small piece, "Seeds." I think, it says it all.

Acrylics, storybook clippings, on canvas panel, "5 x 5"

Night and Day

Day 7

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

I had Billie Holiday on, while I was working in my studio yesterday, and she was singing "Night and Day." I love this song, in particular because it reflects a much slower pace of life than we have nowadays, especially here in the States. A few decades ago the lyrics of this sweet Cole Porter song were still thinkable and sort of convincing. I mean, the idea of being able to withdraw from all the surrounding traffic and noise and to forget all about your own business, just to hold on and to completely indulge in your yearnings. How beautiful and how luxurious. It seems, that lovesickness is no longer a very accepted state of mind. Come on, snap out of it, there are other fish in the sea, don't waste your time. Yes, time. We are rushing through all aspects of life. 

So, my "Night and Day" here is the remastered version of the song.  See the little man in his hamster wheel. No need to ever take his pajamas off because time has shrunk, and morning alarm and bedtime have gotten much closer together. There's still some longing for something, but no time for schmaltziness.

"Night and Day"
Acrylics, 45rpm record sleeve, storybook clipping, on canvas panel, 8" x 8"

Yin and Yang

Day 6

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge, hosted by Leslie Saeta.

These two things are on the path to finding the equilibrium of their wholeness.






The "Yin and Yang" are held together by the front and back flyleaves of an old poetry book. I actually love how it all came together - literally.

"Yin and Yang"
Acrylics, book pages and clippings, on canvas panel, 12" x 16"

Make Room

Day 5

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

My daughter woke me up early in the morning to let me know that there was something really disgusting in the living room. Half of a gecko was lying there, neatly placed between the half-done spiderman puzzle on the floor and the old black collapsible chair with the half-attached seat cushion that has already lost half of its plushy filling. I loved the obvious "half" theme here, so intriguing, and I think I will do a "half" theme piece very soon. I already have a clear picture in my head.

Anyways, this is my piece for today: "Make Room." I wanted to do something based on the concept that a room is constructed by the person creating the room by placing herself or himself in it. In this case by the tiny dancer.

"Make Room"
Acrylics, ink, book clippings, on canvas panel, 9" x 12"

You Better Believe It

Day 4

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.

I just loved finding these little sugar and spice jars!

I immediately knew that I had to make them into a piece about the idea of Creation. And about the flabbergasting arguments defending this concept.


"You Better Believe It"

Watercolor, acrylic, storybook clippings, on canvas panel, 12" x 12"

Another Good Trick

Day 3

of the 30 Paintings in 30 Days challenge.
 
I have been working on several pieces today. Once in a while my 8-year old daughter came into my studio and gave me her opinion on things. I like her ideas and insights a lot. We talked about a certain piece I want to do and that I would like to incorporate a tiny drawing of hers. She agreed but said that she will have to buy it from me for five dollars. I guess, it's a deal.

Anyways, I finished this small piece today, inspired by what has been in the news. I have to be cute with my worries, otherwise I would just sit and cry.

"Another Good Trick"
Watercolor, ink, storybook clippings, on canvas panel, 5"x5"

Last Supper

Day 2

of the "30 Paintings in 30 Days" challenge!

The chickens are having dinner, or better: One chicken is having dinner, while the others are serving - happily or not. Quite soon, they will all end up as dinner themselves, so their happiness and roles don't really matter - or do they?

By the way, I enjoyed including the little humpty dumpty here because he always reminds me of this very odd dream that I had just before I gave birth to my son Jacob ten years ago. I dreamed that I would give birth not to an actual baby but to a gigantic sperm cell with arms and legs. Hobby psychiatrists, feel free to analyze.

"Last Supper"
Watercolor, ink, storybook clippings on canvas panel, 12"x16"

Fortune

Day 1

So, I have signed up again for the "30 Paintings in 30 Days Challenge" hosted by artist Leslie Saeta. I really enjoyed doing it last year, it was a very intense and very valuable experience. I learned so much, I found my process and my style. And I will say, I have been quite successful ever since. I have sold nearly all of my 30 paintings and more, and I had the chance to have a few small pieces in a group exhibit a few months ago. Next Spring I am going to have a solo show even. And did I say, that I received an Honorary Mention for my sculpture "Undo?" Needless to say that all this makes me very happy. I am a visual writer, a storyteller, and I found my listeners. I found my art home, that's a good place to be.

Inspired by all this, I made "Fortune." For years I have been keeping this wisdom in my wallet that came from a fortune cookie: "Fear is just excitement in need of an attitude adjustment." This "fortune" - being in control of your fear - has got so relevant these days. To consider fear a rational choice and not an emotional state of mind, didn't quite occur to me before for some reason, at least I wasn't applying it to myself or my own life. I keep reminding myself.

"Fortune" - acrylics, ink, book clippings, fortune cookie fortune, on canvas panel, 12"x9".

Kaleidoscopes

My sample which I made for my recent
"Printmaking: Mandalas" summer art camp
(which I should have called "Kaleidoscopes").

My daughter Mona had her first day of school today. For all of us this is a very different kind of first day of school. Because Mona decided to leave the local Montessori School, the place where she and her older brother Jacob have been all their school lives. We love the Montessori concept and we love all the teachers at "our" Montessori school. It was convenient, too, having both kids at the same school. We know most families there, and for a few years I have been teaching art to the elementary and middle school kids.

However, when I was talking to Jacob and Mona about the different school options that are out there, Mona immediately said that she wanted to go to the public school. She loves the idea of trying something new, meeting new people, making new experiences and challenging herself in many ways. I thought that she may change her mind after a few weeks, but no, she didn't.

We all went to tour the school. Someone from the school office showed us the classrooms, the gym, the library, the detention room. Mona loved it, even the detention room. The school was in the middle of major constructions, heavy machines were sitting in the hallways, some floors looked shinier than others and were fenced off with stripy tape. Motivational sentences on the walls. It smelled differently.
Yes, that's what I want, Mom. I really really really love it. This is my school.

Mona's piece.

So we went to buy pencil toppers, wipes, and composition books. We filled out the enrollment forms and handed them to the school board officer who was sitting behind thick glass. And then we checked out the various khakis and poloshirts with their hardly noticeable individual details (which at  the end, make all the difference) and found that most of these uniform pieces looked odd and uncomfortable and not very flattering on my very slim Mona. I don't know why I was surprised.

Several times, Jacob said to his sister, you are so brave, I couldn't do it. I am not for change, I like things to be the same. Which is not really true. He just loves where he is right now, in every literal and not literal way. He is such a thinker and reader, his view of things, of the world, has been changing fast and profoundly. But he is probably not noticing his change because he has been doing his thinking and reading mainly in that same cheap collapsible black armchair that we bought a few years ago and which is close to falling apart any time very soon; only thin fibers are holding the seat and frame still together, sooner or later this chair will make him move to another place.

And Jacob's work.

Mona's change is much more visible. She has just discovered that she can and may choose her path. That it doesn't have to be the one that her older brother is walking, even if this path has proven to be a good one.

It's like turning kaleidoscopes at different speeds. No matter how fast they turn them, the reflections are in the bag, or better, in the tube.  And the patterns are constantly changing to something new and fascinating.

Breathe

I've just finished my third art camp of this season, and it feels like I am floating in a parallel world. Or better, I am diving in some water. Only once in a while I will come up to breathe and feel the warmth of the sun and then return to my life under the sea. 

I didn't teach any summer art camps last year, and I had completely forgotten how intense those can be. Part of that is that I usually teach classes that I haven't taught before.

Because I love coming up with new projects. Because I like to teach myself something new as well. New projects are a fun challenge but, of course, quite time-consuming too. Maybe I should take it easier, be more relaxed about everything.

But then, I want everyone who comes to my classes to have a valuable experience. I find it very rewarding to teach the kids (or adults) something new, to ignite something in them, and then to see them so proud of their skills and their works.

This is especially true when it comes to my 10-year old son. Jacob is an artist - in his own, unique, way. He has some terrific writing skills, and I love his witty cartoon drawings. He doesn't really like to deal with paints and brushes though, well, with things that are harder to control than pencils, and with projects that need a long time until they are finished.

My daughter Mona (8) is curious about all kinds of visual art, she is driven to master every medium, and I guess, sooner or later, she will.

Anyways, I have taken both my kids into my studio for all my camps this summer. I had to talk Jacob into the first one, but when I asked him to come to the second, and then the third, he said, what a weird question, Mom, of course I want to come, I love your camps. Okay.

So here are some pictures of my second art camp, "Insect Abstractions."

We worked on three projects to go from a realistic pencil drawing to a more abstract watercolor/ink drawing and then to an even more abstract oil pastel. For the last one we focused only on a detail of the particular insect.

The three moths are Jacob's, Mona made the beetles.